Monday, May 29, 2006

Friday, May 26, 2006

Pseudocamping

So we had a camp out type dealy overnight yesterday. Mind you we were all up most of the night before we had been up working on lab reports and our prospectus presentation so loopy was a good adjective. We got crazy amounts of food for the all of us and drove all over Gods good creation trying to find the place because we were too lazy to stop the car and pop the trunk to get the directions. It's ok we had time to kill. We had crazy good food and like 10 lb of steak and I swear to you that it was done to perfection. I ate a LOT of steak. We didn't have utensils or proper plates either so it was mostly the gnaw on what is in your hand as you stand around the fire all primitive like with blood dripping down the elbows...well the kids that like their steaks bloody anyways. There was a pieiron too!!! (Dr. Story is my hero) We played some cribbage and tossed some frisbee/football and played in the fire and once it was good and dark we ran about 300 ft of extention chord from the bathouse and watched Life Aquatic in surround sound with jiffy pop popcorn. Did I mention we were staying in this strange place where they used to keep depth charges. Surreal is another good adjective.

Things you may here around a campfire dominated by chemists and biolgy majors:
Too bad we couldn't bring any -OH groups
Can I throw the adipose tissue in the fire
Sometimes it is ok to eat high on the food chain
It's ok its just a little extra carbon
Ah yes the Beeris canus... would that make guiness the sub speices?
Look at all the parasites in that juicy steak

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Pecado no toque

Interesting things happen when I am left to my own devices...

We get 3 day weekends during MBI. I spent mine bouncing.
States I spent time in: ME, CT, MA, NH.
Miles Castby and I drove: over 600 I think...basically enough to drive home
Hours I slept: less than 10.

In addition I talked to old friends, made new friends, consumed quite a quantity of -OH groups, ate some pretty stellar food, got a quasi-internship opportunity, got lost a few times, changed my oil, saw a new house, met a new gf, played cribbage, and wrote a little tiny bit. I did not go to church or get a great quantity of work done which are very important things. I wouldn't trade it for anything but lets just say I don't want to do it again next weekend. I R tired.

Someday you will get pictures of good things.

-Jn

Saturday, May 20, 2006

I suppose

They tell me I am supposed to blog because it has been a while and graduation is important and one must document one's life for one's self and posterity. I tell myself that there have always been lots of important things that just never got done. Like that project and that paper and my lab hours. ::Shrug::

They tell me that I graduated last weekend. They proved it by dressing me in all black with a complimentary doofy hat and walking me across a stage in front of 100s of people and handing me an empty blue plastic case in which to place a diploma if they deem me worthy enough to receive one after reviewing my grades. I tell myself I won't believe it until I know I passed Intro. Though, I do believe in the stage- I felt it with my bare feet.

They tell me it rained for a week. They proved this with a lot of rain, sandbags, closed roads, flooded houses, a sump pump in the basement, closed stores, mud, and the complete lack of sun. I am willing to believe this one- I was there.

They tell me that I am enrolled in a class with 5 other people. They prove it by holding me in a building when the sun shines and thrusting me out when it rains and talking at me constantly between the hours of 9 and 5. I have words and pictures in a notebook, bacteria cultures in the cooker, my boots are muddy and I have blisters on my ankles. I think these things are related.

They tell me I am living in a house with 5 other people. They prove it by cooking me meals, mixing me drinks, finding furniture, moving it around the house, and requesting that I please do the dishes and find beds. I respond by forgetting the dishes and wandering around the house with a glass in hand like a lost puppy and not sleeping as much as I think I may need to.

They tell me I am a poet. They prove it by publishing one of my scripted memories in a small book so that I can ship it off to friends. Some things I do not need to be told...sometimes its nice to hear them anyways.


Definition (05/19/06 - Back Porch)

Curious, Spurious
And unfaithful
But only in the spirit of the word
I stick to the law
And illegitimacy is a comfort
Sometimes

Definitions trite
And a horrible way to live life
As if life were meant for living
In the threads of being and meaning
And a good end assured

By the way, have you heard?
They teach lessons in demure
To reach that ever-pleasant end
Mental acrobatics
Logarithmic, mathematic
And worth less than
What it costs to win a man
In some more vulgar way
Maybe you should try
It’s just not the sort of bank
I would through my nickel in

I prefer a gambling game
Walking the thin line above
This pit of death and something-like-love
Biding my time
Bidding my hunches
Placing hopes on hollow air
When the bet ‘just feels right’
They tell me patience comes
To those who wait
Sometimes

No.
I dance on the damn wire
Because nothing gets you higher
Than tempting fate and the drop
And I’m all-in
Always
‘Cause upended and falling
Seems better than the wait
Or showing up too late

And this is not the first time
I’ve put gravity on trial
I always claw back up again
Because
And sometime you’ll see
Someone will catch me
And teach me to tread lightly
On the fingers of the wind
Almost like flying
Besides,
I’m used to the sudden stop at the end

-Jn

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

It is still raining

The Rains That Came (Mac 109, 5/16/06)

Sing me a song
Of the faded old fisherman
Down by the docks
He wades by the rocks
And he casts
And he casts
And he casts
Every day, everything the same
He walks these shores
And he used to pray
Until the day God spoke.
The rains came
His family, his home
All washed away…

And the daffodils grow this year
Yellow like life, green like new
He hears nothing but the gulls
No children laughing, no one to love
No colors but gray and white and the sea
Like his beard, and the gulls
And the rains that came

-Jn


We went out in the field anyways...Oh and by the way we eat good and the house still leaks and we are about half moved in and I write you from class...oops...more later

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Hmm

I was going to write more tonight but I am playing with the gate instead. This means you get something from earlier in the week. I am not as passionate about this poem as I was when I first wrote it but oh well...

The Breakdown

Only three beats
Three beats from a breakdown
I am on my feet again
Standing on my own two feet
But for who really knows how long

Two beats
Two beats from a breakdown
And I am running
Running from the sound

One
One beat from a breakdown
Thunder, landslide all around

This is the breakdown

-Jn

Remember...

Remember this and remember how much I truly do love these people and how excited I am to live with them? Yeah. Remember how much fun we have together hanging out and being stupid and how much I loved spontaneous parties in the penthouse? Yeah. Remember the time grandma told me I WOULD be going to my graduation and I WOULD be walking across the stage and she WOULD be there? Yeah. Remember how she and my grandpa are dying from too many long years of cigarettes and booze and they won't be attending because they just can't make the trip? Yeah. Remember how I gave up alcohol for lent and didn't cheat once and found more creative ways to deal with my stress to prove that I wasn't an alcoholic and didn't actually have a problem? Yeah. Remember how that is one of my buttons, me and alcohol because I pay very close attention and am very cautious because I know my family history and I respect myself? Yeah. Remember how much it sucks when you and a friend clash at the core and you can't look them in the eye because whatever you see will hurt? Yeah. Remember how cold and lonely it is on the outside when you are too tired to play the games and not perky enough join in with other people? Yeah. Remember how finals are over and graduation is in 3 days and then summer starts and I get to live with some amazing people and do some of my favorite things in the world and how exciting that is? Yeah. Remember the last time I was truly, deeply happy?....I don't either.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Yeah...I donno

Ariadiea by Morning

Three suns rise as the moon sets
And I hurry to an unblessed hovel
I won’t make it home in time
These suns rise in the west

We wonder how they don’t spin wrong
But the gods they tell us
Guide them by ineffable song
And so we pray to them nightly
Beneath the cool moon
Before we tend our beasts
Bathe our children
And take to the plow

It is winter now
And the fields grow full
We horde these small grains,
Golden piles beneath the ground
In reverent silent worship
Of the sky-fires we will never touch
Like so many ants
For the summer comes
And the suns draw closer
To scorch our thirsting earth
But the gods they tell us
Designed it this way
And who are we to question

-Jn
As much fun as scheduled events and parties and dances are...sometimes those spontaneous ones are just that much better.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

A smattering of formal pictures

I was thinking green dog instead of flowers but they told me they dont like dancing.
In college its cool if the girl asks the guy.
Three of the happy hippies- Jn, JJ, and Steph!
The forever and ever roomies
Some monkeys that I happen to like

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Death of an opera star


Ode to Odocoileus virginianus
A pair
Wandering
Wondering
Which way to greener grasses?
Are brighter flowers around the bend?
Struck down
Eviscerated
Emasculated
And thrown
With child sent tumbling
Before ever tasting sunlight
Casualties of a dark night
And cruise control
-Jn