Hey look at me. I can write in New England too!
Without Intention (7/26/05-Ipswich)
You opened your arms and I came to you
In that house back in the cove
Without intention
Or comprehension
And I was yours
More than you know
I thought I was alone without lonely
Until you pulled me in close
You looked at me
What did you see
I was yours then
More than I know
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Monday, July 25, 2005
So my really long post, as promised. I suppose I will start with me because I am egocentric and this is after all MY blog. I am laying here on (my bed which is not actually mine though my sleeping bag is on it) in my room (which counts as mine because I pay for the use of it) typing on my computer (which is fully mine- paid for with a summer of hard work) that is not connected to the internet. When I get around to messing with the stupid modem I will actually online this for the masses cause I know a couple of them care.
The ride up in state by state format:
Penna was mostly dark and there were no cars on the beautiful highway and it was all for me. I felt vaguely poetic but as I was driving it was hard to wrestle the thoughts to paper and so they escaped me. Then the sun came up and I found some tunes on the radio and the world was a very good place to be.
I was all of the sudden in New York and I didn’t get to drop any more money into the PA economy. (They make me pay taxes in that state because I don’t leave enough money there when I am home for breaks) New York wouldn’t have been much except I stopped at a rest-station to use the rest-room and fell asleep. It wasn’t exactly like that. I called mom to let her know that I was in NY and alive and she talked for a while. . . I woke up cause I forgot to use the aforementioned rest-room and realized I had paralyzed my right arm. It had some crazy parking brake indentations and it was a pretty interesting color. I spent some time pulling out the pins and needles and went on my merry way. I remember skirting the city and paying to cross the bridge but maybe I remember wrong. I thought I would have some warning but. . .
I was in Connecticut. And I needed gas. Damn the way life works out. I might have made it through sept a little bit ahead of me a blue Astro van was dancing with a trailer truck and some other cars. 3 lanes of bumper to bumper 65 mph New England traffic slowed to sludge in seconds and the two breakdown lanes filled up with idiots trying to get by the mass. The only time any movement happened for a good half hour was when an ambulance or fire truck tried to get through and everyone had to move into theoretical spaces out of the way. There were lots of flashing lights. . . So I bought gas at the top ranked Sunoco in the great state of Con or so the perky little girl on the recording informed me. Apparently it was because of good regular customers like me. Well gee aren’t I swell. I bought the cheap flavor because it also happened to be the most expensive Sunoco in the state. Never buy gas in Connecticut. Pushing to the next state will be less work than the work hours you pour into your gas tank. I consequently found out that my car gets significantly lower gas mileage on ‘cheap’ New England gas. And I found a new set of roads that leads me around Hahtfahd which was spectacular. I have no problem driving in 65 mph B to B traffic on curvy city roads but well moderate traffic with the slow-goers pushing 80 gets you places a whole lot faster.
Connecticut practically pukes* you onto the MassPike. And that ladies and gentlemen is when I knew I was home. I got cut off twice in the first 5 minutes and it made me feel all warm and fuzzy. I wanted to flick them off and shout ‘I missed you!’ at the same time. All of the sudden I could forget I had turn signals, weave through traffic at breakneck speed and drop my R’s with a smile. And boy did I smile. I was driving my roads again and I could shut my eyes and the car would know where to go like a horse headed home sept this time we steered towards Ipswich. I got off at the wrong 1 north but I fixed that shockingly well and I definitely got lost in the center of Ipswich but only because I followed the printed directions and not what I remembered. The only other oops the whole trip was when I drove past the house.
All told it took me 12 hours including one nap/potty break and 2 chunks of stopped traffic (the second was on the mass pike but it was just people being Massholes** so it doesn’t really count for much. I was stuck in the mix too) and no I did not stop and eat anyplace. I had chips. . . and they were organic. . . and blue.
------ If you intend to finish this marathon of reading in one sitting more power to you, if you are getting eye strain call this chapter 2 and take a lil break. I won’t mind. --------
So the house then… It is amazing. I don’t remember it being so woof. I got about an hour just me and the dog and the cat to roam around falling in love with it again before my landlady (henceforth to be referred to as LL) came home. I claimed my room or it was selected for me, whichever you are more comfortable with. There was junk in the other available domicile so I crashed in here and decided a bit later that I did in fact like it better. So Lz gets stuck with the one that is bigger and gets the ocean and the morning sun and the bigger closet and the cool shelf thing. I get to flash the neighbors.
I have all of my stuff moved in and I know how everything is going to go after I return safe and sound from Peru and I am more than a little excited about this amazing house. And I can put bolts into the screen porch for my hammock and my Igs can stay in my room or wherever and there is a compost pile and we recycle (paper even- score!)
So today (7/24) I went to church for the first time in eons and I was late because I am just that awesome. (Curse Ipswich and my bad sense of direction) And it was amazing and well the feeling isn’t really the warm fuzzy cause that fades pretty quick it is like a deep gush of goodwill to everything that moves and its pretty hard to kill (Kinda like Jimmy Buffet in ‘God’s Own Drunk’ sept I definitely wasn’t drunk. We don’t get drunk. . . in church) And I got to see tons of HQ people after church including 4.
I made it home with no issues and spent good bit of time talking to LL about random things. She is an artsy-fartsy environmentalist but surprisingly down to earth if you can make those 2 compute. And I found some open space on the floor of my room which led me to my books.
I started reading text books for Peru- which may not sound exciting but do you know how many cool populations questions and weird ecological phenomena are hidden in that rainforest (and my text). I am all goosebumpy just thinking about it. (Why ARE there so many different types of trees in the rainforest?) I have decided that I NEED to see an anteater and a 3-toed sloth or I may just die. And I want to try cerviche except that will probly kill me too. It might just be worth it. Ha, there is this whole section in the back of the book about things that can do you serious harm and the author cautions to leave it alone or don’t pick it up and usually adds though I don’t think you will be tempted. But mom haven’t you always want a pit viper or a 5 foot boa or a poisonous centipede? How about a bullet ant, an urticating caterpillar or a bird eating tarantula? Honestly how can I NOT pick these things up? I am a very tactile person. I think that is why they stuck me in mammals. There aren’t too many of those that could kill me except for rabid dogs in the city and well, the jaguars. But it might be an honor to be killed by a jaguar and if they can find my body they can ship me-pieces out cause I have insurance.
I am so excited. You have NO idea. I can’t type anymore because I am too giddy. This is long enough anyways. But that’s ok because it needs to hold you over for at least a few days.
- Tabanid squisher :)
---------------------
* I recounted being puked into MA today at church and received several comments on how accurate that description is. You have fun figuring out the anatomical details there.
** The other day me and my good buddies SM and Shuffdog were talking about what people from different states were called. (ie Pennsylvanians, Mainers) and we were running out of states and SM asked what they called people from Mass. Me and Shuff said Massholes at the same time. SM kinda chuckled awkwardly until we thought about it and confirmed that we have no clue what else you would call them. I still donno.
The ride up in state by state format:
Penna was mostly dark and there were no cars on the beautiful highway and it was all for me. I felt vaguely poetic but as I was driving it was hard to wrestle the thoughts to paper and so they escaped me. Then the sun came up and I found some tunes on the radio and the world was a very good place to be.
I was all of the sudden in New York and I didn’t get to drop any more money into the PA economy. (They make me pay taxes in that state because I don’t leave enough money there when I am home for breaks) New York wouldn’t have been much except I stopped at a rest-station to use the rest-room and fell asleep. It wasn’t exactly like that. I called mom to let her know that I was in NY and alive and she talked for a while. . . I woke up cause I forgot to use the aforementioned rest-room and realized I had paralyzed my right arm. It had some crazy parking brake indentations and it was a pretty interesting color. I spent some time pulling out the pins and needles and went on my merry way. I remember skirting the city and paying to cross the bridge but maybe I remember wrong. I thought I would have some warning but. . .
I was in Connecticut. And I needed gas. Damn the way life works out. I might have made it through sept a little bit ahead of me a blue Astro van was dancing with a trailer truck and some other cars. 3 lanes of bumper to bumper 65 mph New England traffic slowed to sludge in seconds and the two breakdown lanes filled up with idiots trying to get by the mass. The only time any movement happened for a good half hour was when an ambulance or fire truck tried to get through and everyone had to move into theoretical spaces out of the way. There were lots of flashing lights. . . So I bought gas at the top ranked Sunoco in the great state of Con or so the perky little girl on the recording informed me. Apparently it was because of good regular customers like me. Well gee aren’t I swell. I bought the cheap flavor because it also happened to be the most expensive Sunoco in the state. Never buy gas in Connecticut. Pushing to the next state will be less work than the work hours you pour into your gas tank. I consequently found out that my car gets significantly lower gas mileage on ‘cheap’ New England gas. And I found a new set of roads that leads me around Hahtfahd which was spectacular. I have no problem driving in 65 mph B to B traffic on curvy city roads but well moderate traffic with the slow-goers pushing 80 gets you places a whole lot faster.
Connecticut practically pukes* you onto the MassPike. And that ladies and gentlemen is when I knew I was home. I got cut off twice in the first 5 minutes and it made me feel all warm and fuzzy. I wanted to flick them off and shout ‘I missed you!’ at the same time. All of the sudden I could forget I had turn signals, weave through traffic at breakneck speed and drop my R’s with a smile. And boy did I smile. I was driving my roads again and I could shut my eyes and the car would know where to go like a horse headed home sept this time we steered towards Ipswich. I got off at the wrong 1 north but I fixed that shockingly well and I definitely got lost in the center of Ipswich but only because I followed the printed directions and not what I remembered. The only other oops the whole trip was when I drove past the house.
All told it took me 12 hours including one nap/potty break and 2 chunks of stopped traffic (the second was on the mass pike but it was just people being Massholes** so it doesn’t really count for much. I was stuck in the mix too) and no I did not stop and eat anyplace. I had chips. . . and they were organic. . . and blue.
------ If you intend to finish this marathon of reading in one sitting more power to you, if you are getting eye strain call this chapter 2 and take a lil break. I won’t mind. --------
So the house then… It is amazing. I don’t remember it being so woof. I got about an hour just me and the dog and the cat to roam around falling in love with it again before my landlady (henceforth to be referred to as LL) came home. I claimed my room or it was selected for me, whichever you are more comfortable with. There was junk in the other available domicile so I crashed in here and decided a bit later that I did in fact like it better. So Lz gets stuck with the one that is bigger and gets the ocean and the morning sun and the bigger closet and the cool shelf thing. I get to flash the neighbors.
I have all of my stuff moved in and I know how everything is going to go after I return safe and sound from Peru and I am more than a little excited about this amazing house. And I can put bolts into the screen porch for my hammock and my Igs can stay in my room or wherever and there is a compost pile and we recycle (paper even- score!)
So today (7/24) I went to church for the first time in eons and I was late because I am just that awesome. (Curse Ipswich and my bad sense of direction) And it was amazing and well the feeling isn’t really the warm fuzzy cause that fades pretty quick it is like a deep gush of goodwill to everything that moves and its pretty hard to kill (Kinda like Jimmy Buffet in ‘God’s Own Drunk’ sept I definitely wasn’t drunk. We don’t get drunk. . . in church) And I got to see tons of HQ people after church including 4.
I made it home with no issues and spent good bit of time talking to LL about random things. She is an artsy-fartsy environmentalist but surprisingly down to earth if you can make those 2 compute. And I found some open space on the floor of my room which led me to my books.
I started reading text books for Peru- which may not sound exciting but do you know how many cool populations questions and weird ecological phenomena are hidden in that rainforest (and my text). I am all goosebumpy just thinking about it. (Why ARE there so many different types of trees in the rainforest?) I have decided that I NEED to see an anteater and a 3-toed sloth or I may just die. And I want to try cerviche except that will probly kill me too. It might just be worth it. Ha, there is this whole section in the back of the book about things that can do you serious harm and the author cautions to leave it alone or don’t pick it up and usually adds though I don’t think you will be tempted. But mom haven’t you always want a pit viper or a 5 foot boa or a poisonous centipede? How about a bullet ant, an urticating caterpillar or a bird eating tarantula? Honestly how can I NOT pick these things up? I am a very tactile person. I think that is why they stuck me in mammals. There aren’t too many of those that could kill me except for rabid dogs in the city and well, the jaguars. But it might be an honor to be killed by a jaguar and if they can find my body they can ship me-pieces out cause I have insurance.
I am so excited. You have NO idea. I can’t type anymore because I am too giddy. This is long enough anyways. But that’s ok because it needs to hold you over for at least a few days.
- Tabanid squisher :)
---------------------
* I recounted being puked into MA today at church and received several comments on how accurate that description is. You have fun figuring out the anatomical details there.
** The other day me and my good buddies SM and Shuffdog were talking about what people from different states were called. (ie Pennsylvanians, Mainers) and we were running out of states and SM asked what they called people from Mass. Me and Shuff said Massholes at the same time. SM kinda chuckled awkwardly until we thought about it and confirmed that we have no clue what else you would call them. I still donno.
Sunday, July 24, 2005
Um. . .
I am here or back or home or whatever in the Ipswich house now. Internet is kinda screwy so when I get a chance I am gonna post a good long blog for yuns guys but you will have to wait until at least tomorrow. And yes virginia there are Greenheads in my house. (Insert random stream of curses that some people dont like me to use) Thats all from this cowboy. . . girl- Jn
Friday, July 22, 2005
Mmm Dashboard
I am leaving my rolling PA hills (and humidity #&*!) for a pretty little salt marsh (and greenheads *$%) in MA. I get to spend the next 10 hours in my car. I love my car. I am gonna drive in the middle of the night. I love the middle of the night and I love driving. All I need is open road and open gas stations.
Contents of my CD player:
1. Paul Simon- Graceland
2. Counting Crows- Ghost Train
3. Train- Drops of Jupiter
4. Dexter Freebish- Leaving Town
5. Our Lady Peace- Somewhere Out There
6. Counting Crows- Have You Seen Me Lately? (acoustic)
7. Dave Matthews Band- Where Are You Going?
8. Jane's Addiction- Jane Says
9. Fuel- Bad Day
10. Matchbox 20- Push
11. Red Hot Chile Peppers- Scar Tissue
12. The Clarks- So You Can Sleep at Night
13. Rusted Root- Heaven
14. Live- Where Fishes Go
15. Bare Naked Ladies- Never is Enough
16. Sublime- What I got
17. The Grateful Dead- Truckin
18. Tom Petty- Free Falling*
19. Everclear- American Girl* (acoustic cover)
*Cause I can't seem to find the Tom Petty version of American Girl.
Contents of my CD player:
1. Paul Simon- Graceland
2. Counting Crows- Ghost Train
3. Train- Drops of Jupiter
4. Dexter Freebish- Leaving Town
5. Our Lady Peace- Somewhere Out There
6. Counting Crows- Have You Seen Me Lately? (acoustic)
7. Dave Matthews Band- Where Are You Going?
8. Jane's Addiction- Jane Says
9. Fuel- Bad Day
10. Matchbox 20- Push
11. Red Hot Chile Peppers- Scar Tissue
12. The Clarks- So You Can Sleep at Night
13. Rusted Root- Heaven
14. Live- Where Fishes Go
15. Bare Naked Ladies- Never is Enough
16. Sublime- What I got
17. The Grateful Dead- Truckin
18. Tom Petty- Free Falling*
19. Everclear- American Girl* (acoustic cover)
*Cause I can't seem to find the Tom Petty version of American Girl.
Woohoo
I just finally got everything packed up so I am not gonna leave now. I will just go to bed early and get up in the middle of the night (when i prefer to function anyways) and start then. SO. . . for now I get to waste time online filling the web with verbage.
10* Reasons why yesterday was stellar (in relatively sequential order)
1. Brent made me a cd (that i listened to on the way home which counted as yesterday)
2. I got my phone back except it wasnt worth fixing mine so I got a brandy new one for cheaper and just switched my chip over.
3. Wes was at the gun counter again. He was the guy I talked to last time I went in wondering about binoculars so it took a lot less time. Plus he didnt treat me like an idiot, he really knew what he was talking about, and he told good stories. To top it off he was reasonably good looking. In general it was a very pleasant trip to walmart for once and I bought milk at the gun counter.
4. I got to talk to Brotha T out in front of walmart about a Christian drug rehab program that they are trying to bring to Pittsburgh. It is a great idea and he was really excited about life which carries over when you talk to someone.
5. I bought binoculars. I wasted crazy amounts of time just lookin at stuff which is exactly what you do in lab sept I was OUTSIDE. I was hoping to find a 4-leaf clover with um cause that would be a great story, but it didnt work out for me.
6. 72 swallows on the telephone wire (some sing low, some sing higher) and more flying around everywhere. It was like a convention and it was kinda creepy with them all watching me. I counted them with my binoculars for practice. .:pats self on back:.
7. I washed my car and checked all the vital signs. I love my car.
8. I made BLTs for dinner with stuff from the garden and had left over bacon for breakfast today (bonus)
9. I found out that I like rum. . . but just a little rum. . . mixed with other things. . . like a lot of sprite.
*um thats all I have so I will carry one over from today to make an even 10.
10. Tyler called today from Iraq and we talked for forever. We are going to have a James Bond marathon for days (and he is going to make me chicken wings) when he gets a chance to come home on leave. Damn I miss that kid.
----------------------------------
3 Things that make today icky (in decreasing order of ick)
1. It is humid enough to gag a donkey (dont think to hard about that) and it refuses to rain so the appliances are fighting back. Anything that is even remotely cooler than air temp is covered in water and drooling puddles all over the floor. There is a moat around our fridge.
2. It took me forever to pack so I cant leave til later.
3. I packed my hammock
10* Reasons why yesterday was stellar (in relatively sequential order)
1. Brent made me a cd (that i listened to on the way home which counted as yesterday)
2. I got my phone back except it wasnt worth fixing mine so I got a brandy new one for cheaper and just switched my chip over.
3. Wes was at the gun counter again. He was the guy I talked to last time I went in wondering about binoculars so it took a lot less time. Plus he didnt treat me like an idiot, he really knew what he was talking about, and he told good stories. To top it off he was reasonably good looking. In general it was a very pleasant trip to walmart for once and I bought milk at the gun counter.
4. I got to talk to Brotha T out in front of walmart about a Christian drug rehab program that they are trying to bring to Pittsburgh. It is a great idea and he was really excited about life which carries over when you talk to someone.
5. I bought binoculars. I wasted crazy amounts of time just lookin at stuff which is exactly what you do in lab sept I was OUTSIDE. I was hoping to find a 4-leaf clover with um cause that would be a great story, but it didnt work out for me.
6. 72 swallows on the telephone wire (some sing low, some sing higher) and more flying around everywhere. It was like a convention and it was kinda creepy with them all watching me. I counted them with my binoculars for practice. .:pats self on back:.
7. I washed my car and checked all the vital signs. I love my car.
8. I made BLTs for dinner with stuff from the garden and had left over bacon for breakfast today (bonus)
9. I found out that I like rum. . . but just a little rum. . . mixed with other things. . . like a lot of sprite.
*um thats all I have so I will carry one over from today to make an even 10.
10. Tyler called today from Iraq and we talked for forever. We are going to have a James Bond marathon for days (and he is going to make me chicken wings) when he gets a chance to come home on leave. Damn I miss that kid.
----------------------------------
3 Things that make today icky (in decreasing order of ick)
1. It is humid enough to gag a donkey (dont think to hard about that) and it refuses to rain so the appliances are fighting back. Anything that is even remotely cooler than air temp is covered in water and drooling puddles all over the floor. There is a moat around our fridge.
2. It took me forever to pack so I cant leave til later.
3. I packed my hammock
Ten-cent word
I was gonna finish packing today and leave tomorrow but stuff happened. I was also gonna post some pictures but other stuff happened. And I thought about writing a couple of things but well there was stuff and it didnt work out. So due to the voluminous amount of stuff, I am going to bed. Tomorrow I will wade through stuff to clean up stuff and pack other stuff and sort stuff out but for the next several hours I honestly refuse to care about anything. Except how much I love my bed. Yay bed. -Jn
Something something blah
How many times have you been pushed around?
Was anybody there?
Does anybody care?
How many time have your friends let you down?
Was anybody there?
Did anybody stare?
How many time have your friends let you down?
Just open up your heart
Just open up your mind
How many times has your faith slipped away?
Well, is anybody safe?
Does anybody pray?
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we're alive
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we'll survive
How many days have you just slept away?
Is everybody high?
Is everyone afraid?
How many times have you wished you were strong?
Have they ever seen your heart?
Have they ever seen your pain?
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we're alive
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we'll survive
She gets high
She gets lost
She gets drowned by the cost
Twice a day, every week, all her life
She gets high (2x)
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we're alive
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we'll survive
All messed up, but we'll survive
-Our Lady Peace, "life"
(See I dont just post counting crows)
Was anybody there?
Does anybody care?
How many time have your friends let you down?
Was anybody there?
Did anybody stare?
How many time have your friends let you down?
Just open up your heart
Just open up your mind
How many times has your faith slipped away?
Well, is anybody safe?
Does anybody pray?
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we're alive
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we'll survive
How many days have you just slept away?
Is everybody high?
Is everyone afraid?
How many times have you wished you were strong?
Have they ever seen your heart?
Have they ever seen your pain?
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we're alive
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we'll survive
She gets high
She gets lost
She gets drowned by the cost
Twice a day, every week, all her life
She gets high (2x)
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we're alive
Oh, Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up, but we'll survive
All messed up, but we'll survive
-Our Lady Peace, "life"
(See I dont just post counting crows)
Thursday, July 21, 2005
Her name was McGill she called her self Lil and everyone knew her as Nancy
Oh my goodness. These past 2 days have been crazy and I have accomplished nothing to the end of getting myself packed up. But I have seen everyone I wanted to see this summer while I was home at least twice (which is a low number in my opinion) except Ryan cause I can't find him and Jandy who refuses to come back up and play with me.
I went out to the Lube two days ago with Stephen and Shuff dog. Shuff had never been. Crazy. Everyone should go at least once in their lifetime. It probly wont be the last time. It's just SOOO good. And I got wing sauce all over my nose. I think that is a good thing.
And then I was working hard and being all busy with my dressers and actually doing something and Nik called to say she was at Moraine with boyfriend Tim in tow. Well crap come on over so I can see you. She didnt make it to my house until like 9 but we had a crazy good time talking and playing pool and watching movies. It was so late they crashed at my house so we got to have another crazy time talking in the morning. And she got to see my dresser which I really wanted because I knew she would love it and would want to do it. Thats pretty much exactly what she said. "jenn I love this. I am gonna do it now." It makes me happy that we know each other so well. And they left so late that I had to leave with them to make it out to Brents
It is wicked easy to get to his house. I never even thought about getting lost. It was amazing. And we went out for pizza at the yuppie Pizza Hut which is just strange and went 4-wheeling and got to play on these crazy jumps and we stopped for a long time beside the crick and just watched the woods. We almost got crunched by a deer too and I met some of his friends which was cool. And we went swimmin in the river with the moon up way high and got to count the cars on the train (104 and 4 engines) which was weird and really cool. And then I came home and crashed right away cause I have been going non stop with people for a long time for me.
Now I have a today to get everything done that needs done before I leave. I dont think I will make it. I am gonna try anyways. I have picture to post later but that will be like a midnight break so dont wait up. - Lil
I went out to the Lube two days ago with Stephen and Shuff dog. Shuff had never been. Crazy. Everyone should go at least once in their lifetime. It probly wont be the last time. It's just SOOO good. And I got wing sauce all over my nose. I think that is a good thing.
And then I was working hard and being all busy with my dressers and actually doing something and Nik called to say she was at Moraine with boyfriend Tim in tow. Well crap come on over so I can see you. She didnt make it to my house until like 9 but we had a crazy good time talking and playing pool and watching movies. It was so late they crashed at my house so we got to have another crazy time talking in the morning. And she got to see my dresser which I really wanted because I knew she would love it and would want to do it. Thats pretty much exactly what she said. "jenn I love this. I am gonna do it now." It makes me happy that we know each other so well. And they left so late that I had to leave with them to make it out to Brents
It is wicked easy to get to his house. I never even thought about getting lost. It was amazing. And we went out for pizza at the yuppie Pizza Hut which is just strange and went 4-wheeling and got to play on these crazy jumps and we stopped for a long time beside the crick and just watched the woods. We almost got crunched by a deer too and I met some of his friends which was cool. And we went swimmin in the river with the moon up way high and got to count the cars on the train (104 and 4 engines) which was weird and really cool. And then I came home and crashed right away cause I have been going non stop with people for a long time for me.
Now I have a today to get everything done that needs done before I leave. I dont think I will make it. I am gonna try anyways. I have picture to post later but that will be like a midnight break so dont wait up. - Lil
No sleep til Brooklyn
I have stories and picture and events and thoughts to share. I do not have sleep. Mmmmm sleep.
Monday, July 18, 2005
Sunday, July 17, 2005
A turn of events
I sulked myself onto my hammock porch (No cigars for me thanks) and sat around watching life and it just sorta came. I feel so much better. It's a crazy good turn around. I even made myself an awsome dinner. Makes me happy all over just thinking about the past two hours. mmmm. . .
Not much to say - 7/17/05 Hammock Porch
A haunting song fills the air
As the wind tickles my bottle of beer
I dont know why it reminds me of you
But I'm glad that you're not here
Because then you could see the real me
I don't hide it so well these days
It seeps out through my tone of voice
And leaves etches on my face
I'm not saying that I miss you
Though I'm far away from home
And I'm not saying that I love you
Just that I don't do well alone
A storm is rolling in fast tonight
I can feel the thunder in my soul
Sometimes I flirt with lonely
But I'd never want you to know
So I imagine I see your headlights
Pulling in this dirt track
And your not saying that you missed me
Just that you want me back
So hold out your hand and I'll come to you
And I'll let you take me home
I'm not saying that I love you
Just that I dont want to be alone
Now I can face the world again. I can cook things and clean things and pack things and sand things and paint things. Its like a good long sigh.
Not much to say - 7/17/05 Hammock Porch
A haunting song fills the air
As the wind tickles my bottle of beer
I dont know why it reminds me of you
But I'm glad that you're not here
Because then you could see the real me
I don't hide it so well these days
It seeps out through my tone of voice
And leaves etches on my face
I'm not saying that I miss you
Though I'm far away from home
And I'm not saying that I love you
Just that I don't do well alone
A storm is rolling in fast tonight
I can feel the thunder in my soul
Sometimes I flirt with lonely
But I'd never want you to know
So I imagine I see your headlights
Pulling in this dirt track
And your not saying that you missed me
Just that you want me back
So hold out your hand and I'll come to you
And I'll let you take me home
I'm not saying that I love you
Just that I dont want to be alone
Now I can face the world again. I can cook things and clean things and pack things and sand things and paint things. Its like a good long sigh.
Addendum
I thought of two redeeming parts of today. 1. The baby ducks love me. 2. Mr. Bird found himself a woman, and she is busying herself with moving in. To his credit he has not stopped singing for 5 solid minutes since the moment she said yes which makes the porch a little noisier today.
Sullen
I have been in a bad mood since, oh probly since I figured out I couldnt write more than 4 lines that went together. I had so much flowing off the finger tips and nothing worked out. Poetic impotence. Damn. The muse was there he just wouldn't stay on one topic- a babbling drunk. And really I cannot actually find words to describe what I am feeling, though Sullen is what I am acting and Damn is what I am thinking and Nothing is what I am doing.
And then there was the rabbit. Somewhere between realizing my inability to write and my refusal to accept it I went downstairs to find inspiration. I found a rabbit. I dont like rabbits. I never really have. And here he is with his cute little wiggly nose and invader in my house. How in the Hell did he make it into my house anyways. I am good and 'holding down the fort' (which i have decided is a ridiculous expression- before the bad mood). But there is this nagging thought that 1 the cat is going to eat the bunny which seems kind of cruel (not the actual eating of the rabbit cause that is natural, but pinning down a baby rabbit in a house is like feeding a deer corn and shooting it in the head) or 2 the rabbit will just die of starvation and the house will smell forever. Here I was brooding in my own problems and I have to save a baby bunny. I was pissed. Then of course the rabbit doesnt understand that I mean to save his miserable little life and he runs away. The damn thing has the gaul to run into mom's sewing room, which if you havent seen it looks like Joann Fabrics imploded (complete with a fishtank). I lost him. The stupid thing is gonna DIE in the sewing room and I cannot find him and I just felt, well, thwarted (thank you for re-adding that word to my vocabulary). I was gonna sic the cat on him but I remembered that I had already labeled that as 'cruel' and while I was feeling about as mean as ever I did not want to be 'cruel'. So I blocked the damn thing in the sewing room with some lettuce found my 'inspiration' and went back upstairs.
The muse had not sobered up. Rather the 'inspiration' focused me but the muse was snoring off the beer and would not be roused. I eventually fell asleep staring at the blackness of my ceiling.
My alarm that I forgot to shut off woke me up in the same foul mood as I went to bed and I located the rabbit in question shortly after I went down stairs and set him out in a patch of clover. (There was about a 5 minutes period while I watched him that I thought 'Just maybe I might like rabbits' but it faded pretty quick when I found one in the garden) The only problem is that I found him in the dining room and there was no way he was getting out of that sewing room without magical powers. So I may or may not have another rabbit running around in my house waiting to get eaten by the cat or starve to death. I dont know. It is very disconcerting. I also chose that moment of realization to stop caring and I went out to work on my dresser.
The RQ wanted a rabbit story posted and one must keep her happy to keep one's head. I don't think its the kind of story she wanted but there were no specifics to that end so this is all she gets. And you get to suffer through it- provided you read the whole thing.
And then there was the rabbit. Somewhere between realizing my inability to write and my refusal to accept it I went downstairs to find inspiration. I found a rabbit. I dont like rabbits. I never really have. And here he is with his cute little wiggly nose and invader in my house. How in the Hell did he make it into my house anyways. I am good and 'holding down the fort' (which i have decided is a ridiculous expression- before the bad mood). But there is this nagging thought that 1 the cat is going to eat the bunny which seems kind of cruel (not the actual eating of the rabbit cause that is natural, but pinning down a baby rabbit in a house is like feeding a deer corn and shooting it in the head) or 2 the rabbit will just die of starvation and the house will smell forever. Here I was brooding in my own problems and I have to save a baby bunny. I was pissed. Then of course the rabbit doesnt understand that I mean to save his miserable little life and he runs away. The damn thing has the gaul to run into mom's sewing room, which if you havent seen it looks like Joann Fabrics imploded (complete with a fishtank). I lost him. The stupid thing is gonna DIE in the sewing room and I cannot find him and I just felt, well, thwarted (thank you for re-adding that word to my vocabulary). I was gonna sic the cat on him but I remembered that I had already labeled that as 'cruel' and while I was feeling about as mean as ever I did not want to be 'cruel'. So I blocked the damn thing in the sewing room with some lettuce found my 'inspiration' and went back upstairs.
The muse had not sobered up. Rather the 'inspiration' focused me but the muse was snoring off the beer and would not be roused. I eventually fell asleep staring at the blackness of my ceiling.
My alarm that I forgot to shut off woke me up in the same foul mood as I went to bed and I located the rabbit in question shortly after I went down stairs and set him out in a patch of clover. (There was about a 5 minutes period while I watched him that I thought 'Just maybe I might like rabbits' but it faded pretty quick when I found one in the garden) The only problem is that I found him in the dining room and there was no way he was getting out of that sewing room without magical powers. So I may or may not have another rabbit running around in my house waiting to get eaten by the cat or starve to death. I dont know. It is very disconcerting. I also chose that moment of realization to stop caring and I went out to work on my dresser.
The RQ wanted a rabbit story posted and one must keep her happy to keep one's head. I don't think its the kind of story she wanted but there were no specifics to that end so this is all she gets. And you get to suffer through it- provided you read the whole thing.
Saturday, July 16, 2005
Little bird- day 3
I didnt take any pictures today but I can report that he was showing his place off to a prospective. I don't know if she liked it or not but he is bringing in smaller pieces and grass now which is probly the equivalent of plasterboard or wallpaper.
In the field
So I started packing for Peru today and I am positively giddy. Not even really at the thought of the trip cause that hasn’t set in yet. It was more the act of pulling out my field gear and thinking ‘I get to use this soon!’ So what follows is a happy little list of 6 things (in semi-ascending order of giddiness quotient) that make me glad I am a field biologist.
6. Compass- you just feel cool using a compass
5. Field notebook- a happy little book with waterproof paper full of illegible to anyone but you scribbles
4. Waterproof pens- You can go into an artsy fartsy craft store and not feel awkward
3. Field Clothes- the most comfortable clothes I own, those t-shirts that you can’t quite retire yet
2. Waders and/or big rubber boots- I don’t know about you but I look HOT in waders
1. Flagging tape- come on who Doesn’t like flagging tape?
And as the good Dr. Boorse stated when we really over topped in the crick, ‘You know you are committed when your underwear gets involved.’
6. Compass- you just feel cool using a compass
5. Field notebook- a happy little book with waterproof paper full of illegible to anyone but you scribbles
4. Waterproof pens- You can go into an artsy fartsy craft store and not feel awkward
3. Field Clothes- the most comfortable clothes I own, those t-shirts that you can’t quite retire yet
2. Waders and/or big rubber boots- I don’t know about you but I look HOT in waders
1. Flagging tape- come on who Doesn’t like flagging tape?
And as the good Dr. Boorse stated when we really over topped in the crick, ‘You know you are committed when your underwear gets involved.’
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